Mar 3 2010

The Gyro Bowl

gyro bowl

I personally never had a problem using a bowl, and if my kids ever did, I would tell them to learn to use a damn bowl, not buy them a gravity-proof vessel like the Gyro Bowl. But then again, I’m not stupid.

Best line: “Look, it’s not even spilling pudding on my mom’s favorite cashmere sweater!” What’s that little demon child doing eating pudding over her mom’s sweater anyway? Seems like she’ll find a way to ruin the sweater despite the bowl, because she is evil. Just look in her eyes.

I also must take issue with the name of this product, because when I read it I think of a delicious Middle Eastern meal. Blatant false advertising, because I doubt this so-called Gyro Bowl comes with savory slices of greasy lamb included, and if it did I would be worried.

Oh, and here’s the company’s website, if you just can’t wait to go out and buy one of these magical devices.

This is the best video I could find, but since it’s off the website it’s all auto-starty and small. Sorry about that. If you see a better version on YouTube or whatnot, do let me know!


Feb 4 2010

Naked office viral ad from Bud Light

I don’t know what the ad people at Bud Light were drinking when they came up with this viral spot. I would guess they were drinking Bud Light, but that doesn’t get you drunk, so it must have been something else.

I like the idea of a naked office, but this commercial just doesn’t make sense to me. Why are only some of the employees nude or partially nude? And what does this really have to do with beer? And why are some people seemingly uncomfortable working there, even though they clearly knew it was a naked office from day one?

All I know is that it doesn’t make me want to drink beer, and that’s pretty damn hard to do.


Feb 3 2010

And the winners are…

Trophy 2009

A few readers spoke, and millions more probably intended to but never got around to it, and finally the winners have become clear to me! The best and worst ads of 2009 are…

Best: The Shake Weight!

Worst: Windows 7 Launch Party!

I couldn’t have picked better winners myself! The Windows 7 Launch Party ads were truly horrendous, and the Shake Weight has provided us all with hours of unintentional entertainment. Worthy recipients, these.

Thanks for voting!!


Jan 26 2010

Baby Alive

baby alive

I remember wanting a Baby Alive doll, and I’m not sure if I ever got one. But boy, do these commercial take me back. The best line: “I made a stinky.”


Dec 30 2009

Slate’s “Ads we hate” list

Slate has released their list of the most atrocious ads of the year, and I have to say I agree about most of them, though they left out some egregious offenders, like Philips Colon Health. Regardless, here’s the list…enjoy!

Ads we hate (Slate)


Dec 30 2009

Does every Pepto Bismol commercial have to be disgusting?

….and I don’t mean “disgusting” in a Tyra Banks “you look so fashionable” way. Take the new Pepto ad, below, which is based around the concept of farting in someone’s face. There are a lot of ways to illustrate how bad it is to have gas, like illustrating the searing gas pain the flatulence sufferer must endure, but the guys at Pepto went for the tried and true face fart joke. Dudes, Chaucer totally did it first.


Dec 28 2009

A creepily dirty moment in the Elderplan commercial

I’m not sure what Elderplan is, but this ad caught my ear when the female representative at about the one minute mark says something that sounds dirty but isn’t. She’s talking about cheesecake, wasting valuable phone time by humoring a customer (something she’ll surely get in trouble for as soon as the commercial is over), when she says “You’re making me really hungry” in a way that makes it sound like she really wants to say “horny.” Maybe she’s attempting to have covert phone sex with her boyfriend, using code words like “cheesecake” and “Elderplan.”

Another thing I don’t like about this ad is that the host lady acts like she’s not ready to start filming at the beginning of the ad. I know they’re trying to seem all cool and casual about the whole thing, but then they start in with their professional graphics and prepared sales pitch. It’s almost as bad as when people end ads by saying “cut” and showing people walk off the set, chatting with each other about how well the ad went. This one ends almost as annoyingly, and even more confusingly, with the lady asking some guy at the fake phone bank where he’s going, like she didn’t think she was still on the air. Ugh.


Dec 21 2009

VOTE! Worst Ad of the Year

Before you all sneak away for Christmas vacation, I’d thought I’d throw the second poll out. Here are the finalists for the biggest steaming pile of advertising feces excreted in 2009. The finalists are…

*Latisse

*Philips Colon Health

*The Double Down Sandwich (KFC)

*Feed the Pig

* Windows 7 Launch Party

Now kindly vote below, and have a wonderful holiday!

What was the worst ad of the year?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

Dec 17 2009

VOTE! Best Ad of the Year

Finally, the time has come to decide once and for all which ad least turned our collective stomachs this year. To refresh your memory, the five nominees are…

* The Quizno’s Toasty Torpedo

* Sweet Million (NY Lottery)

* The Slap Chop Remix

* The Shake Weight

* Nannerpuss (Denny’s)

Now vote, readers, vote!

What was the best ad of the year?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

Dec 10 2009

Best Ad of the Year Nominee #5: Nannerpuss

“You can call me Nannerpuss, Nannerpuss…and guess what, I love pancakes!”

You sure do, Nannerpuss.

(P.S. This is a Denny’s ad that I originally wrote about here.)


Dec 10 2009

Worst Ad of the Year Nominee #5: Windows Launch Party

toilet trophy

The final entry in our list of the worst ads of the year is the series of Windows 7Launch Party” infomercials. Just. Awful.


Dec 8 2009

Link Time!

computer-nerd

In honor of the ongoing holiday season, a classic ad for one of my favorite foods – DListed

Another awesome DListed ad article, this time about a classic board game ad – DListed

Indie music in advertising (full disclosure: the article was written by a friend) – Quiet Color

The D&G threesome ad! – Grazia Daily

Least thought given to a product award: Aciphex (my thoughts exactly!) – MLS Debris



Dec 8 2009

Best Ad of the Year Nominee #4: The Shake Weight

The Shake Weight had to have a place in the top five ads of the year, if only because it’s so obviously making visual reference to masturbation. When I wrote about the ad a little more than a month ago, I couldn’t decide which version was better, and I still can’t. The female one looks just as pornographic as the male one, so I will nominate both ads equally.


Dec 6 2009

Worst Ad of the Year Nominee #4: Feed the Pig

toilet trophy

I’m not sure exactly when these Feed the Pig ads started, but I’m fairly sure it was this year. Either way, they’re stupid. I think they’re supposed to be public service announcements encouraging people to save money, but the only thing they’re successful at is giving me nightmares. That freaky pig needs to go away.


Dec 6 2009

Best Ad of the Year Nominee #3: The Slap Chop Remix

The third nominee for 2009’s best ad of the year is a little infomercial that stole my heart. The product being advertised, the Slap Chop, isn’t that amazing, and the original ad, while wacky, wasn’t all that interesting either. But then a DJ named Steve Porter did a funny remix, and the Slap Chop people decided to go with it for a new version of their ad. It was a gutsy move, but it paid off.